A blood-curdling scream bellowed from upstairs. My mom was screaming for her life.
Instead of running to her aid, I couldn't hold it in any longer, I laughed so hard I cried.
Both of us nearly peed our pants.
Obviously, I knew exactly what had happened—my mom had fallen victim to another one of my pranks.
I had gotten a hold of a Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan promo poster for the release on videocassette.
In the infinite wisdom of a teenager, I thought it would be hilarious to put this door sized poster of a killer on my mom’s bathroom door.
It was the perfect prank. It was the time of year when it was already dark by the time my mom got home. That darkness would play a role in the fright.
Her bedroom had an attached bathroom that would require her to turn a corner and head down a hallway to use the facilities—better yet, it would be nearly pitch black as she rounded the corner.
Yes, things could go terribly wrong if her bladder was too full, but it was worth chancing it.
I knew she would round the corner to head down the hallway leading directly to her bathroom at some point.
After she turned on the light, she would discover a man just standing there, staring her down through his hockey mask, seemingly ready to do harm to anyone in his way.
And that’s pretty much what happened…
Right after she let out the long, high-pitched scream (and her heart started beating again), she realized what was happening.
“JOSEPH WAYNE GILLIS!!!” I knew I was in trouble since she threw down my full name, but I didn’t care. It was worth whatever was about to happen. Besides, I couldn’t stop laughing long enough to worry about the outcome of my actions.
To be honest, the joke nearly killed both of us, because I was doubled over with laughter and could barely breathe.
All my evil planning paid off.
Last Halloween, some of my sinister slasher film humor was shown off in a video for Beyond Geek. Okay, it wasn’t that sinister, but I did win Scariest Costume at a Halloween Party, so I guess someone thought it was. The video was a costume build for another one of the big bad slasher guys from my childhood: Michael Myers… Well, sort of. It was my cosplay mashup of Halloween and Star Trek.
Yep, I finally returned the Michael Myers mask to its rightful owner, Captain James T. Kirk, creating Captain Myers.
Until next time, may your hallways remain clear of Jason or The Shape.
Joe